NO. 9 IN THE “I AM” SERIES – IN A NARCISSISTIC RELATIONSHIP

TODAY I’M COVERING THE TOPIC OF THE “I AM” IN A NARCISSISTIC RELATIONSHIP. PEOPLE OFTEN FIND THEMSELVES IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH SOMEONE WHO IS A NARCISSIST WHETHER WITH A PARENT, SIBLING, BUSINESS COLLEAGUE OR EVEN PARTNER AND WHAT THIS DOES TO THE PERSON IN THIS NARCISSISTIC RELATIONSHIP IS THAT IT ERODES INTO THEIR OWN SELF ESTEEM, INTO THEIR OWN WELLBEING AND INTO THEIR RELATIONSHIP WITH THEIR OWN “I AM” AND THIS IS WHY IT IS A VERY UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIP TO BE IN.

NARCISSISM CAN COME IN MANY DIFFERENT FORMATS OR FREQUENCIES AND PRESENTS IN MANY DIFFERENT INSIDIOUS FORMS AND ULTIMATELY IT IS VARIOUS FORMS OF ATTACK WHETHER THROUGH DEGRADATION, DISMISSAL, UNDERMINING, MANIPULATION, COERSION, GUILTING OR SHAMING THE PERSON. THERE ARE MANY DIFFERENT WAYS IN WHICH IT CAN PRESENT ITSELF.

IN THE SITUATION WITH A PARENT FOR INSTANCE AS A CHILD WE CAN BE GROOMED BY THE PARENT TO REACT IN A CERTAIN WAY TO BEING GUILTED OR MANIPULATED BY THE PARENT TO GET WHAT THEY WANT OUT OF THE CHILD. IN A RELATIONSHIP WHEN YOU ARE IN A PARTNERSHIP OR MARRIAGE WITH A NARCISSIST IT CAN PRESENT ITSELF IN DIFFERENT WAYS COMING FROM THE NARCISSIST WHO FEELS ENTITLED AND HAS A VERY STRONG OPINION OF THEMSELVES AND WHO IS MANIPULATIVE AND HAS NO EMPATHY FOR THE PERSON BEING ATTACKED THEY SOMEHOW FIND PLEASURE FROM THE PAIN OF THE VICTIM OR THE PERSON WHO IS UNDER ATTACK.

IT IS IMPORTANT TO RECOGNIZE THAT THERE IS SOMETHING IN THIS FOR THEM AND THEY NEVER TAKE RESPONSIBILITY BECAUSE THEY DO NOT RECOGNIZE THE ROLE THAT THEY ARE PLAYING.

THEY WILL NOT TAKE ANY RESPONSIBILITY FOR BLAME FOR INSTANCE IF THERE IS SOMETHING THAT HAS HAPPENED THAT THEY HAVE DONE WRONG OR A SITUATION THAT IS PRESENTING THAT IS NEGATIVE THEY LOVE TO SHIFT THE BLAME.

THEY ALSO USE GASLIGHTING WHICH IS A FORM OF ATTACK BUT CREATES DOUBT IN THE PERSON THAT IS BEING ATTACKED. IT MAKES THE PERSON DOUBT THEMSELVES BECAUSE THE NARCISSIST WILL ACCUSE YOU OF SAYING SOMETHING YOU KNOW THAT YOU NEVER SAID OR DOING SOMETHING THAT YOU KNOW YOU NEVER DID OR ACCUSING YOU OF NOT DOING SOMETHING YOU KNOW THAT YOU HAVE DONE OR SHOULD HAVE DONE BUT ACTUALLY DONE IT BUT GET TOLD YOU NEVER DID IT.

OR GET ACCUSED OF NOT SAYING SOMETHING YOU NOW THAT YOU HAVE SAID AND THEY SAY YOU NEVER SAID IT. WHAT IT ULTIMATELY DOES IS MAKE YOU DOUBT YOURSELF AND QUESTION YOUR OWN SANITY IN A WAY BECAUSE YOU ARE BEING ACCUSED OF THINGS THAT HAVE OR HAVEN’T TAKEN PLACE WHEN YOU KNOW YOU ARE INNOCENT. WHEN DONE SUFFICIENTLY OFTEN ENOUGH IT MAKES YOU DOUBT YOUR OWN RECALL AND MEMORY OF THINGS AND IS ANOTHER FORM OF UNDERMINING YOU AS A PERSON.

A NARCISSIST HAS A CRUEL STREAK OF SADISM AND THEY GET PLEASURE FROM YOUR PAIN AND THE BEST WAY OF HANDLING THIS IS TAKING THE ANALOGY OF A DOORBELL AND TAKING THE BATTERY OUT OF THE DOORBELL, YOU CAN PRESS IT AS MUCH AS YOU LIKE BUT THERE IS GOING TO BE NO RESPONSE FROM THE DOORBELL.

THE BEST WAY TO HANDLE THIS FORM OF NARCISSISTIC ATTACK WHEN YOU ARE CONSCIOUS OF IT, IS TO HAVE A NEUTRAL RESPONSE TO IT SO WHEN THE PERSON ATTACKING YOU NO LONGER GETS THE DESIRED RESPONSE OR THE RESPONSE THEY HAVE BEEN USED TO GETTING THEY WILL CHANGE THEIR TACTIC OR REALISE THAT WHAT THEY ARE DOING IS TO NO AVAIL.

I HOPE YOU HAVE ENJOYED THIS LITTLE VIDEO AND IF YOU FEEL THAT YOU MAY NEED SOME HELP PLEASE FEEL FREE TO PRIVATE MESSAGE ME OR CONTACT ME VIA MY WEBSITE WHICH IS WELLNESSONSTEROIDS.COM AND I WILL BE DOING ANOTHER VIDEO ABOUT BEING IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH A MISOGYNIST.

PLEASE LIKE AND SHARE THIS AS THERE ARE MANY IN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIPS AND SOME MAY NOT EVEN BE AWARE OF THE ABUSE AND THIS MAY BE ABLE TO HELP THEM TO SEE AND RECOGNIZE THAT IT IS NOT NORMAL AND THAT THEY DESERVE BETTER AND DESERVE TO BE RESPECTED.

IN SAFEGUARDING OUR OWN “I AM” WE ARE RESPECTING AND HONOURING OURSELVES WHICH IS OUR DUTY.

WISHING YOU WELLNESS!

BRENDA